How to make anyone fall in love with you?

From eye contact to aloofness,techniques to make anyone fall in love with you

When it comes to falling in love, good looks and a great personality can certainly lure potential mates.

But to get the job done, sometimes it pays to be clever, experts say. Knowing how human beings tend to respond to certain behaviors and social cues can help you turn a fun fling into long-lasting love.

Make googly eyes

We’ve all heard that “eyes are the windows to the soul.” Never underestimate the power of eye contact. According to a 1989 study, participants who exchanged mutual and unbroken eye contact for two minutes reported increased feelings of passionate love for each other, even if they were total strangers.

Play hard to get

In a dream world, you could approach your crush, declare your love for them, and receive an honest appraisal of their feelings in return. But, unfortunately, things are never that simple in real life. That’s why people play games; specifically they play hard to get. According to the “scarcity principle” invented by Robert Cialdini, objects that are rare, unique, or limited in time will make people desire them more. In one study of college students, four women were shown pictures of men they were told either liked them “a lot,” “an average amount,” or who “were uncertain of their feelings,” and then we’re asked to rate how attractive they found each photo. If you guessed that they found the “uncertain of their feelings” guys the most attractive, you’d be correct!

Proximity

Being nearby helps a lot. Yeah, unromantic and obvious but if you’re looking for love, definitely ask yourself where you’re spending your time.In another study, conducted in Columbus, Ohio, in the 1950s, 431 couples who applied for marriage licenses were interviewed. It turned out that 54% of the couples were separated by a distance of 16 blocks or fewer when they first went out together, and 37% were separated by a distance of 5 blocks or fewer. The number of marriages decreased as the distance increased between the couples’ places of residence.

Who becomes friends in the dorms at college? People who are similar? No.People who are nearby.

Character

People like people who are nice and smart and funny and make them feel good and zzzzzzzzzzzzz. Yeah, of course.Let’s talk about the other side of character. What are you like inside?Having a strong sense of who you are and a lot of self-confidence is a good predictor of whether you’re going to fall in love with anyone.People who have a high frequency of love experiences tend to have high self-confidence and low defensiveness… Insecure people who do not have a coherent sense of self and who are not self-actualized tend toward a game-playing style of love and have relationships with low levels of intimacy and high levels of conflict… A study that compared the levels of people’s self-identity to the levels of intimacy in their relationships showed that Erikson was right. The stronger people’s sense of self, the higher their ability to be intimate.

Similarity

Opposites attract… um, not all that much

People are likely to choose as lovers and marriage partners those with similar characteristics. Furthermore, the more similar couples are in personality and background, the more comfortable they are with each other, the more compatible they feel, and the greater their satisfaction from the relationship. Consequently, couples who are similar in attitudes, temperament, and behavior are more likely to stay together over time.

Emphasizing similarity when getting to know someone is always a good idea. It’s one of the key pillars of influence documented by persuasion expert Robert Cialdini.

Arousal

Any type of situation that affects us emotionally increases the chance of falling in love.In one-fifth of the romantic attraction interviews, the relationships described started during stormy periods in the lives of the men and women interviewed. Sometimes, the heightened emotional sensitivity followed an experience of loss, such as the death of a parent or a painful breakup.

This is why people fall in love on the rebound. This is why we see Stockholm Syndrome. This is one of the reasons musicians are more attractive.We can’t really tell what is causing our feelings and we have to guess. It’s called mis attribution of emotions. So any emotionally arousing situation has the potential to fool us into thinking we’re in love.When we are aroused, the origin of the arousal does not matter, and it does not matter whether we are aware of the reason. Arousal automatically reinforces our natural response, including attraction to a potential partner.Even an action movie can do it.Some of the couples watched an action movie; others watched a movie that was less arousing. It turns out that the couples who watched the arousing action movie expressed more affection toward each other after the movie than they did before seeing it. The non action movie had no effect on the amount of affection expressed by the couples who watched it.